VACAY

We haven’t gone on a trip in over two years. Wait–we did get on a plane to California last Christmas. But that was it.

Now we get to go on a vacation. Yay! So much fun! But the week BEFORE vacation is so busy, I need a vacation just to rest up from getting ready for it. Here is an itemized list of what needs to be done before leaving:

  • Kick husband out of guest bathroom. I have never understood why he uses that one, since we have a perfectly good master bath with two sinks in it. Then, after removing all of his accoutrements (shaver, lotion, nail fungus meds {ugh}, etc.), I have to clean that bathroom. It also has two sinks, a tub, and a floor that I think I washed last Christmas.
  • Move husband out of his “office” and turn that room into a guest room for the California contingent who will be joining us immediately after vacation. Blow up mattresses, room for luggage, etc. Vacuum and dust that room before setting up, so my daughter won’t find the raisins her daughter dropped in the corners the last time they visited.
  • Go to chiropractor, because “What if your back goes out in North Carolina?”
  • Go to CVS for some of those “travel sized” shampoos, lotions, etc. Husband asks “Don’t we have a bunch of those?” Answer: “NO BECAUSE WE HAVEN’T TRAVELED TO ANY MOTELS IN OVER TWO YEARS.”
  • Change all planned wardrobe choices for vacation since weather forecast says it will be in the high 90’s and low 100’s while we are there.
  • Add super strength deodorant to CVS shopping list.
  • Swiff everything five times because Hattie’s cat hair is EVERYWHERE.
  • Consider teeth whitening strips.
  • Move lumbar pillow from my car to my husband’s car.
  • Reply to everyone suggesting audio books for the trip that husband hates audiobooks.
  • Clean the refrigerator, because what if my daughter opens the door and sees the Nutella stain that was left there the last time they were here.
  • Be sure to stock up on raisins. Also “sugar cereal,” because they only get that at Grandma’s house. The cereals that look the most artificial are preferred.
  • Try to sleep at night, because going on vacation is so damn exciting.
  • Don’t forget to take masks, just in case. Pray neither of us gets a covid variant right before we leave.
  • Warn self that the day after everyone is gone, it will be very sad, but I will get over it.

I will be absent from the blog next week. You probably won’t miss me…

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