You are going to a) play tennis b) take a walk or c) do any other activity requiring sneakers, for instance. You are not a complete nerd. So what do you do? You put on your half socks–you know, the ones that don’t show when your shoes are on. Because remember your grandpa who wore white crew socks and a white patent leather belt when he put on his Bermudas? How embarrassing was it to be seen with him?
But hold on. I have it on good authority that as of today–right now–if you go out wearing shoes with your ankles showing, you are totally out of it. That’s right. The days of old, when the guys on Miami Vice made bare ankles popular? Those days are gone. The style setters, otherwise known as influencers, wear socks. Crew socks and knee socks. Socks with ballet flats. Socks with mules. Socks with loafers (or whatever kind of leather shoe people like Ryan Gosling wear).
I am not kidding. I have seen pictures of Billie Eilish wearing a skirt, knee socks and heels that would make me wonder what she was thinking. What? You don’t know who Billie Eilish is? I don’t either, but trust me, she is famous. With the socks.
Do you have Birkenstocks? My God, you can wear them with socks and actually hold your head up high! And guess what else? Bermudas are back in style, too! Don’t feel ridiculous putting on a pair of bright green Bermudas, a polo shirt (French tuck; that’s for another blog post), threading a belt through the loops, and pulling on a pair of white crew socks before slipping into your Birks. Or even KNEE SOCKS. Those are totally stylish, too! Could black socks be far behind? Of course not! Because socks of any color are totally IN.
This creates a problem for us Boomers. We used to be able to run into a perfectly normal friend, we’ll call him Bob, at Costco; and if Bob was wearing plaid Bermudas and black socks with his sandals on, it was a safe call to lean over to your spouse and whisper, “Oh no, I think Bob may be losing it.”
You could be entirely wrong about Bob. Bob may be an influencer. For all we know, he could have 57,000 followers on Instagram, all of them admiring Bob and his socks, despite the fact that Bob’s wife is mortified to be seen with Bob. No–Bob is actually riding the new wave of style, and it is the rest of us who are living in the past.
You can get really good quality socks at Costco. They are a bargain. Bob and I, and if we are all lucky, Billie; will see you there.